I am writing a YA Paranormal about a girl with a hideous scar on her face. Said scar being the result of downed power line snaking across her body. Not a scar from being struck by lightning. Why did I choose one over the other? I didn't want this book to hit too close to home. But this character has taken over. The more I think about it, lightning not having a role would be selling out on who I am and how I got to be here, typing in cyber space to a small audience. *Insert crickets*
So, I am changing things, tweaking things. Lightning will play a role. It scares the shit out of me to write about it. I researched scars early on. See, my character has a scar that wraps around her left eye like a vine. The scars I envisioned on her face resembled Lichtenberg scars. Scars from the result of being struck by lightning. But I insisted that they would be from a downed power line, not the thing that took my brother from me. Secretly, really deep inside, I think I knew lightning would become a part of this story. I just wasn't ready to face it until now.
The more I write about Rori I wonder if my brother had any of these vine-like scars? Do the survivors that were lucky enough to walk away have any? He was the only one to die that night. I toy with trying to contact them but I'm already pulling on the band-aid over my heart as it is.
I was told that the bolt that killed him hit him in the back of the head and exited his chest. At the funeral I saw no visible scars on his deathly still and beautiful face. The writer in me came from this morbid sense to create an alternate universe. One where he may be alive. Because, young men at the ripe age of twenty-one aren't struck by lightning and killed. Not when their whole life was ahead of them. College graduation, marriage, just being my big overbearing and protective brother. In my heart I couldn't believe such things happened. So, he must in a witness protection program. Kidnapped. Somewhere suffering from amnesia. Maybe he hated us and ran away to live another life. I made up anything so I didn't have to face the truth.
My brother was struck by lightning and died instantly. He left us with scars, some are still gaping wounds. The falling domino still chases me and I wonder if it will ever stop?
Now I create worlds were people survive the unthinkable. I am writing about a fifteen year old girl who survived being struck by lightning. (It's a YA paranormal, kind of scary, no way representing my real life). I'm not sharing that writer part of me yet. This site will remain a place for my Women's Fiction.
While I'm not writing any Women's Fiction at the moment, waiting to see how things pan out for MEET ME IN JERSEY, I am writing. Writing about scars both old and new, the slightly scabbed over and the ever oozing ones. Scars always have a way of ending up in the tales we weave. Finally, I'm able to put the most prolific scar I have into a story. Maybe then I can let it fully heal. Maybe.